It has been a long time since I have been able to put out this update. There are several reasons for this. Time and sensitivity. As you will see, it was a very traumatic week. I've spent a lot of time at the hospital and don't have access to a computer there. I've also tried to figure out what to say. Here's my best shot.

Tuesday, May 14

Tuesday, May 14th, Kent was moved back to a regular room in oncology from ICU. As I mentioned last, his kidneys were not working well but we hoped they would kick back in on their own and clean the toxins out of his bloodstream. He mentioned having some problems with short-term memory, but seemed fairly clear-headed.

Wednesday, May 15

Wednesday was a good day. He seemed much like his old self most of the day, though he did bumble some words and in the evening was having problems staying awake and concentrating. I attributed it to the high blood sugar level caused by the steroids. Still not much from the kidneys.

Thursday, May 16

Thursday morning, Kent called to give me a doctor's report. They were still watching his output, and some of the chemo numbers were coming down. He was alert and coherent and told me he would be OK while I went to work. He was somewhat uncomfortable when I got there around 4:30. He was tired and had trouble getting dinner down. By now he had gained 50 pounds from the fluid that they had given him with little relief.

Friday, May 17

Friday morning, still feeling fairly alert, he sent me off to work. I talked with him mid-morning and he said he was doing OK. At 1:30, my friend Linda called from the hospital and said that Kent was really confused. I rushed over. By 8:00 p.m. he was pretty out of it mentally. He could answer yes/no questions, but he was doing a lot of moaning and babbling. Not much coherence unless we startled him awake, and then only momentarily.

All along, I've been watching his weight creep up (now by 60 pounds). My best guess was that with all the toxins, both induced chemically and metabolically, he was just drowning in his own body. Mentally, he was slipping away. His skin was stretched so tight it was weeping. They gave him a new air bed that alternates pressure so he can get some relief from laying in one position for long periods.

They called in a nephrologist (kidney specialist) to see if dialysis would help rid his body of the chemo from last Sunday. The levels had stayed relatively high since it wasn't being filtered out, even though they had been infusing counter-agents all week. They would look into it.

Saturday, May 18

Yesterday, Dr. B, the weekend oncologist (cancer specialist) was in early. I got to talk with her and her feeling was that things could reverse if we could just get Kent's kidneys back on target. When the nephrologist arrived, she had a different viewpoint. Her interpretation of the lab results were that the kidneys were outputting, but they were not ridding the body of any toxins. (There were a lot of medical terms in there that I didn't feel like memorizing.)

Kent had been choking on something and Linda was trying to help with it. What the doctor saw was him fighting off a Kleenex and then coughing up the problem. She thought he was being aggressive and said that was not a normal reaction to kidney malfunction and that the kidneys couldn't be blamed for this, that there must be some other cause. In addition, there could be lots of problems with dialysis including infection (he has no immune system left), bleeding from implanting the dialysis catheter (he has little clotting capability), or that dialysis may not even work on this chemical. She wasn't even sure they would be able to get a central line in because of his fragile state. Then she asked for my immediate decision. (Nice bedside manner.)

After she left me, she talked some with the oncologist and then Dr. W, the weekend GP came by. They talked and then Dr. W talked with me laying out a lot more info. He said he would talk with the oncologist after dinner and give me a better indication of their take on the treatment.

Throughout this time, Kent, still very confused, had pulled out an IV in the morning. We talked to him to keep him stimulated. I told him to leave bread crumbs so he would know how to find his way back to me. Late afternoon, he pulled out the external portion of the Porta-Cath. We couldn't take any more chances and had to restrain him to the bed for his own good. All of this was breaking my heart. What to do?

Linda and I went to the chapel. We talked and cried and prayed. What would Kent want me to do? His greatest fear in life is living on life support in a vegetative condition, I couldn't put him through that. But I had to keeping hoping that they doctors knew what they were talking about and that things could reverse. We had to do something and fast. I would take the aggressive approach.

Sunday, May 19

Today, when we arrived, I asked the nurse for an update. She said I just missed the neurologist who noted that Kent was unresponsive. I told her that I didn't believe that. Though he was still babbling, when I called his name he opened his eyes and looked at me. Linda and I took in a CD player with some of his favorites. I put on some Sousa marches and he tapped his toes to the music. Now I call that responsive.

Dr. B came in and I told her I wanted to go ahead with the dialysis and what the neurologist had said. I demonstrated for her what he could do. I told Kent she was there and he looked for her. I called his name and he looked at me. I told him I loved him, and he said, "I love you too." That was not an echo. Those were his words and he was telling me to keep up the fight that he had not given up.

Shortly thereafter, the vascular surgeon came to insert the dialysis catheter. It took 3 nurses and aids and 2 doctors to hold him down, even after a 8 grams of morphine. Dr. B remembered that the music had soothed Kent some so she had them turn on the CD. She was holding one hand and trying to soothe him while others did their thing. One aid had to hold his head still. She kept saying, "Look at me, look at me." He responded, "Why do I want to look at you?"

Linda and I were waiting in the hall. Dr. W showed up at that point and Kent was screaming, "Help, help me." I felt like I was being stabbed, but when the doctor looked at me, I said, "At least he is hollering words and not babbles. He's still in there somewhere and is fighting to get out." The doctor said he liked my attitude and went in to help. When he came out, he said it was a scene he will not soon forget. Dr. B was holding Kent's hand and marching to the music. Kent was screaming, the CD was blaring, and the surgeon slipped the line in smoothly.

They moved Kent to a room where they can do the dialysis (it requires special plumbing in the room to cool the dialysis machine) and started the procedure right away. After 2 1/2 hours of today's 6 hour session, he was resting comfortably and I decided to come home and take some Sally respite time. The dialysis nurse did say that Kent had already lost 2 pounds. I figure that the combination of the morphine from the line insertion session and the dialysis, probably gave him great relief. They will continue him on daily 6 hour dialysis sessions until things improve and the kidneys kick in.

I have been asked about visitors. Though Kent is certainly a people person and normally loves visitors, he has absolutely no immune system right now and needs to be kept away from any germs so we are requesting no visitors other than family. Family members are banned if they have any colds or other ailments that may compromise Kent's health. I will of course let folks know when the situation changes.

I hope you understand if I do not post often but know that I will when I can. I feel that my most important mission right now is to support Kent and then to take care of myself. I will probably only be on-line every couple of days and then for only short times since these are very long days at the hospital.

As always, we appreciate your prayers, love, and support. All I can say is keep them coming. We look forward to great progress everyday.

God bless you all,

Sally, Kent & Dr. Barkus Shelby